If you have ever read (or written) a scientific or technical paper, you will be familiar with the structure.

Each paper consists of an Introduction, followed by the Method, Results and Discussion. There are clear guidelines about the types of information that are presented in each section, and these are drilled into students and academics alike.

That structure is diligently upheld by examiners and reviewers, and when you are an academic, it is easy to forget there are other ways to communicate in the written form.

A very simplified overview of the focus and content for each of these sections is as follows:

WHY: Introduction

In the Introduction, your job is to summarise and review the existing literature about your topic. This helps you to place your study in context and identify the gaps to demonstrate why your study is relevant, important and timely. You also outline your hypothesis (what you think will happen), which is based on the literature you have reviewed.

HOW: Method

The Method includes a description of what you did and how you did it. You need to provide sufficient details that somebody else could replicate your study.

WHAT: Results

In the Results, you describe what happened when you did what you did and report (but don’t interpret) the findings of your analyses.

SO WHAT: Discussion

In the Discussion, you summarise and interpret your results, explain what they mean in the context of the literature you reviewed in the Introduction, and discuss the implications of your findings for the bigger picture.

This structure is great – for academia!

This structure is logical and thorough, and ensures the rationale, hypothesis, methodology, findings and implications of the study are communicated transparently.

In this way, the scientific model of testing, measuring, evaluating, and reiterating can be used effectively to build a credible knowledge base.

I have no arguments with this structure when its purpose is academic or technical communication.

So, what’s the problem?

When academics and professionals with technical and corporate backgrounds become entrepreneurs, this framework creates a major barrier between them and their intended audience.

Whether we realise it or not, we frontload our communication with information that our new audience couldn’t care less about.

In business, your intended audience is NOT other researchers or academics who may wish to replicate your study. Nor is it examiners or reviewers who are assessing your ability to conduct and report research.

Rather, your audience is your prospective clients, and, quite frankly, they are predominantly interested in what you can do for them.

This requires a very different style of writing, and it can be difficult to transition from the structure of academic and technical writing to the more conversational structure of copywriting.

Bridge the gap – start with what you know

So, as a way of bridging the gap between these styles, you can start with what you know, and give it a bit of a twist.

Rather than just “free writing” (also known as “throwing spaghetti at the wall” or the “hit and hope method”), you can take each of the sections of the scientific paper and put an entrepreneurial spin on them.

With a creative interpretation of the content requirements for each of the sections, and a minor restructure, you can use your scientific framework to create engaging marketing collateral.

When writing for your business, try this structure:

SO WHAT: Discussion

Describe how the challenge you can assist with impacts your prospective clients in the context of the rest of their life (i.e., their big picture). This is also how you show them that you “get them”, because you can speak to not only their specific challenge, but how it impacts them in a more general way.

WHY: Introduction

Explain why your solution is going to fill the gap for them and provide them with the transformation they are seeking. You may describe the other solutions available in your market, and identify the gaps (i.e., why they don’t work).

WHAT: Results

Describe what they can expect to achieve in their work with you. This could include client testimonials or a description of the results you achieve.

HOW: Method

Last, and definitely least (in your client’s estimation), is an explanation of how you do what you do. As academics, we are trained to focus on the methodology in painstaking detail, because “replicability” is a core foundation of the scientific method.

In business, this is the least interesting component of your messaging. Only those who are interested in working with you are going to be interested in how you achieve your results, so save that until the end.

With practise, you will get more confident with writing for your new audience. In the meantime, using this adaptation of the scientific framework can serve as your training wheels which enable you to transition from the highly impersonal style of academia to the highly conversational style of entrepreneurship.

Here’s to writing fearlessly,

xx Kate

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One of the skills I developed in my academic career was my ability to write for an academic audience.

Imagine my shock and horror when I discovered it was one of my greatest liabilities in my business.

The first time I learned that this previous “blessing” had become a “curse” was when I attended a business coaching seminar.  

At that seminar, all of the attendees were required to develop their elevator pitch (i.e., describe your unique selling proposition in 30 seconds).

Although this was a new genre for me, I had no concerns about my ability to complete this task.

However, with every iteration I created, I became more disheartened.

The feedback I received included:

“Too academic.”

“Too complicated.”

“Too technical.”

“Too process-oriented.”

“Too fancy.”

“Too uppity.”

“Not relatable.”

“Intimidating.”

“Too many stats.”

“Nobody cares about how qualified you are, they want to know what you can do for them.”

I was so confused.

Coming from academia, where you rely heavily on evidence, statistics, qualifications, expertise, and experience to gain credibility, I was totally unprepared for the need to strip all of that back when communicating with my audience.

I had to unlearn the way I had spent 20+ years learning to write. This process required time, energy, effort, and practise. However, it also required a mindset shift.

Academic, technical, and corporate styles of writing are impersonal and do not require vulnerability from the author. This is completely appropriate when the purpose and audiences of those types of writing are considered.

However, I realised that, in addition to being appropriate for that genre, that style of writing also felt safe.

Firstly, because it was familiar but, more importantly, because relying on other sources, quotes and evidence to communicate my point meant that I could leave myself out of it.

When you strip back the stats, and start writing from your experiences (or, shock horror, your heart!), you can feel exposed.

Your work becomes less about the empirical evidence and more about you.

Thus, if people disagree or don’t like what you have written, that feels personal.

And confronting.

And scary.

Hence, the security in stats and other people’s data.

However, sharing your truth is also empowering, and acts as a powerful facilitator of connection with your audience, that an academic, technical, or corporate style of writing can never accomplish.

When you share your truth you feel vulnerable, but you also become relatable, approachable, and magnetic to your audience.

For those reasons, it is totally worth it.

Here are the top 5 things I had to (un)learn to stop writing like an academic and start writing with impact:

• Your audience doesn’t care HOW you know something, they just want to trust that you DO know it.

Don’t overwhelm them with all the statistical reasons for your conclusions. Just tell them what you think/know, and why it is helpful for them to know those things.

• Know the evidence, but don’t include all of it.

Ensure that your writing is either based in evidence or make it clear that it is your opinion. Let your reader know where they can learn more and trust that they can access that information if they choose to.

• Write like a person, not like an expert.

Make your writing as accessible as possible and avoid complicated or technical jargon. If you need to include industry specific language, provide definitions (and, if necessary, examples), so your audience understands.

• Keep “WIIFM” in mind.

Your reader is savvy and possibly in a hurry. Make it clear what’s in it for them so they know you are not going to waste their time.

Unlike academic writing, where you need to “tell them what you are going to tell them; tell them; and then tell them what you told them”, get to the point quickly and avoid redundancy.

• Trust that you are enough.

If you are accustomed to writing in academic/technical/corporate environments, you will be familiar with the importance of leaving your opinions out of your writing. Although this is completely appropriate for those contexts, it can make it difficult to express your truth.

Remembering that you are the expert in your story, and that what you have to say is of value, is an important mindset shift when you are transitioning to writing in a non-academic/technical/corporate style.

I’d love to know which of these tips feels the most challenging for you, and if there are any other important tips I have overlooked. Feel free to let me know your thoughts.

Here’s to writing fearlessly,

Xx Kate

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Last week, I shared a blog about how to make sure you and your editor are on the same page. If you missed it, you can read it here.

Although the tips I shared in that blog are helpful in ensuring:

• your editor knows what you are looking for; and
• you know what to expect,

it is still possible that you won’t always agree with your editor’s feedback.

So, what do you do if you don’t agree with your editor’s changes?

The answer is “it depends”, and here are tips for navigating that situation:

Recognise their expertise but retain your authority as the author.

You are working with your editor for a reason. They are there to support you to bring the best possible version of your book to life.

As such, it is important that you remember they have expertise that are valuable to you, and their advice is worth taking into consideration.

However, this doesn’t mean that you defer to every suggestion your editor makes. As the author, it is your name on the cover, so you need to be completely satisfied with the content of your book.

When I wrote my book, I asked my editor to identify any sentences that came across as too academic. I was mindful that I had spent a lot of time doing academic writing and it was likely that, if left to my own devices, I would lapse into academic-speak.

As requested, she identified a few phrases that could have been deemed academic. When I considered her feedback, I decided that:

• I agreed with her that the phrases she had identified could be considered academic; BUT
• I wanted to leave them as they were.

By choosing to leave my phrases as they were, I wasn’t saying that my editor was incorrect in identifying them as potentially “problematic” (according to the criteria I had given her).

Rather, I appreciated her pointing them out to me, so I could evaluate them from the perspective of, “They could come across as academic to the reader, is that ok?” And for me, it was.

Here are some ways to decide whether or not to accept the suggested changes, or leave your work in its original form:

1. If the change/s relate to rules of punctuation, grammar, or structure:

Check which style the editor is using. It could be that their point of reference is different to yours, so a simple clarification around this issue will be helpful.

As your editor, they are duty-bound to identify any breaches of writing convention.

However, if you have your reasons for over-ruling them: it’s your book, so it’s no problem (they won’t have their feelings hurt, I promise!).

For example, as an editor, I will always identify breaches of writing convention, such as beginning a sentence with “And” or “But”.

However, as an author, sometimes I like to go against those conventions, as that is the way that my idea is best expressed.

In this instance, if my editor pointed out that “technically” I shouldn’t begin my sentences in this way, I would gratefully acknowledge their suggestion, and unapologetically ignore it.

2. If the change/s pertain to idiosyncratic characteristics of your writing:

Consider this feedback extra carefully. Your editor’s feedback, if taken into consideration, could potentially enhance your writing style. Conversely, it could also make your writing seem less like your voice.

My advice is to read through the modified sections aloud (with no tracked changes visible, so you get a “clean” reading experience) and see how they sound.

If the edited version sounds like an enhanced but still recognisable version of your work – great! I’d say this is a good example of effective editing, and recommend you try to apply those recommendations to future sections.

If, however, it no longer sounds like you wrote it, it may be important to revert closer to your original version (taking into account the editor’s expertise and objectivity as a reader).

When deciding which of your editor’s suggestions to accept and which to (respectfully) ignore, it can be helpful to ask yourself this question:

“How will I feel if a reviewer comments on this aspect of my writing in a negative way?”

This can help you to consider whether you feel strongly enough that this aspect of your style is important to your authentic voice as a writer, or if it is worth making the adjustment, based on the feedback you have received.  

Try to leave your ego out of it.

One of the most important aspects of working with your editor is to leave your ego out of it (as much as possible).

Remembering that you are both on the same team, and both want the same thing (i.e., for your manuscript to become its most readable, relatable, informative, evocative, and memorable version) is helpful in minimising the risk of hurt feelings over editorial feedback.

Having your editor make suggestions doesn’t mean you haven’t written your manuscript well. It could mean that, based on their knowledge and experience of this process, they can see opportunities to enhance it.

Also, when it is your work, you will see what you intended, rather than what is actually there. I’ve lost count of the number of times I have read and re-read something I have written, each time missing an obvious error. This is purely because I knew what I meant to say, and therefore saw that word in its correct form each time I read it.

This is why it is crucial to have an editor you trust on your team. They can provide a level of analysis it is hard to achieve when it is your own work. Working effectively with your editor as a co-creator and ally can add that sparkle to your manuscript that comes from a fresh but invested perspective.

If you have any questions about the author-editor relationship, feel free to send me an email: [email protected]

Here’s to writing fearlessly,

Xx Kate

The post What if I disagree with my editor’s feedback? appeared first on Astute Consulting Services.

Writing a book is a big deal. It requires dedication, commitment, and persistence.

However, it doesn’t require you to retreat to a cabin in the wilderness and neglect your life for the foreseeable future (as romantic a notion as that may seem!).

I can attest to the fact that it is possible to write a book and maintain your life, because I did it. In 24 days, to be exact.

But, before you protest that I must be kidding (I’m not), let me add the disclaimer that I had been planning my book for a number of months, and had written other things (such as blogs) that I was able to repurpose for inclusion in my book.

So, I wasn’t starting from nothing.

I should also acknowledge that, generally speaking, I would prefer to write something than say it, so I am quite proficient at producing words on a page.

Plus, my career in academia provided me with many opportunities to fine-tune my ability to write quickly and efficiently, so that skill also came in handy.

Even though these factors may have contributed to the speed with which I wrote my book, I don’t believe they were the reason I was able to write my book without neglecting my life.

Here’s how you can write your book without neglecting your life (even if you’ve never done anything like this before:

1. Create a writing habit that fits with your lifestyle.

Many writing gurus will tell you that you must write every day. I disagree.

For many, writing every day feels impossible, and because they don’t think they can maintain a daily practice, they don’t even bother starting.

My suggestion is to create a habit that you can sustain. It may be daily, weekly, or something else. The frequency of your writing habit doesn’t matter: the consistency of it does.

When you develop a habit of writing regularly (at whatever interval works for you), you are training your brain to produce words on a regular basis. You create a level of automaticity when you form a habit, so the important element is the habit, not the schedule.

2. Create a writing ritual that feels aligned for you.

Creating a writing ritual will help facilitate the development of your writing habit and assist you to use your allocated writing time more efficiently.

It doesn’t matter what your ritual entails, but the most effective rituals involve more than one type of sensory input.

For example:

• Auditory cues – listen to a certain song as you are turning on your computer and preparing to write.
• Visual cues – place a visual prompt within view (I used a laminated copy of my book’s front cover) to remind yourself of what you are focusing on at that time.
• Physical cues – do some stretches or make yourself a cup of tea or coffee, being mindful of the physical actions involved. Even a few deep breaths can be effective in creating a physical cue.
• Olfactory – light a candle or burn some incense.

As with the writing habit – it doesn’t matter what the rituals are, so long as they feel right to you.

To ensure your writing ritual is maximally effective, ensure you have elements that help you transition into your writing time, and other elements that transition you out of it. That way, you create a container for your writing time, which helps you to snap back into your life, when your writing time is over.

3. Give yourself permission to write rubbish. But not too much.

This one may seem counterintuitive, but it is important. Giving yourself permission to write “rubbish” is actually giving yourself permission to not expect perfection in the first instance.

Writer’s block can occur when we sit and wait for the words to flow effortlessly onto the page. If we are editing and censoring our work before it is even out of our heads, it doesn’t take long to get frustrated at the lack of progress.

Instead, try writing (by hand or typing) whatever comes to mind first. You may experiment with different ideas or directions before you get some momentum.

Sometimes, I find myself typing the beginnings of sentences, disjointed phrases, or even just playing a bit of a word association game before I get into a rhythm.

This “rubbish” that often precedes the real content can serve as a bit of a clearing out of ideas and is ultimately helpful.

Usually what appears to be rubbish is actually the beginning of a coherent narrative that can be pulled together in a meaningful way.

There is a limit to this, though. If you find yourself producing many pages of disjointed ideas, with no clear theme or pattern emerging, you may wish to stop and reset.

Take a break and come back to it with fresh eyes and then see if you can find a coherent thread in your writing. If not, it may be worth calling it a day, and coming back fresh another time.  

4. Celebrate your progress.

The neuroscience of motivation has taught us that our brain’s reward circuits need regular reinforcement in order to operate effectively.

This means it is important to acknowledge and celebrate progressive milestones, rather than focusing exclusively on the end goal.

If you don’t allow yourself to celebrate your progress until you have your book in hand, your neurochemistry is going to go on strike and stop producing those wonderful hormones that keep you motivated.

There are a number of ways you can celebrate milestones. If you like quantifiable milestones, you may like to focus on wordcount milestones or completion of individual chapters as milestones.

Other celebration-worthy elements include:

• your consistency as your writing habit is consolidated.
• your commitment to the process, even when it feels hard.
• your exploration of new and different ideas that you hadn’t previously thought about.
• your re-examination of elements of your story or topic that have given you a deeper understanding than you had before.
• the example you are setting for whoever is watching you as you persist with your author journey.

The opportunities to celebrate are plentiful and limited only by your imagination. It doesn’t actually matter what you celebrate – just make sure you do!

5. Seek support if you get stuck.

One of the reasons writing a book can take over your life is if you get stuck, either with the writing or the mindset elements of the process.

When this happens, it is not the time for stoicism or martyrdom. The longer you sit feeling stuck, the more resistance you will build towards moving forwards.

Seeking support from an author coach or mentor, editor, or fellow author, can help you find your groove again and serve as a catalyst for getting your book completed.

Yes, there is scope for solemn contemplation and independent pondering. However, your author journey doesn’t have to be a lonely one. It’s amazing what getting another set of eyes or ears on your situation can do to shift your perspective and identify a path forward.

If you are interested in learning more about how to get your book written without neglecting your life, schedule a free chat with me here: Book a call

Or, you may be interested in joining my upcoming FREE 3-part masterclass: From Pondering to Published – Charting your Author Journey. You can register here:

Here’s to writing fearlessly,

Xx Kate

The post How to write your book without neglecting your life appeared first on Astute Consulting Services.

At first glance, you may consider writing your book a solo endeavour. However, as John C. Maxwell once said, “Nothing of significance was ever achieved by an individual acting alone. Look below the surface and you will find that all seemingly solo acts are really team efforts.”

The key team members in your author journey (apart from yourself) are your editor, proofreader, and designer. Of these team members, the most important relationship to cultivate is with your editor.  

There are a number of different types of editing (discussed in more detail here), and the precise role of your editor will be determined by your decisions regarding the type/s of editing you require.

However, regardless of which type of editing you are looking for, there are some key decisions to make about your editor that will ensure they are a valued member of your team, rather than an afterthought brought in at the last minute.

How to choose your editor

For me, the author-editor relationship is one of co-creation. Although the author is clearly in charge, the editor can play a vital role in ensuring your book is completed in a way that aligns with your aspirations.

With that in mind, here are some factors to consider when choosing your editor:

• You need to trust your editor’s ability to understand your vision and help you execute it. This will become evident in the questions they ask you (see below), and the enthusiasm (or lack thereof) they show for your project.
• Try to avoid freelancer services that have no quality assurance protocols. If you are going for a freelancer service, stick with those that specialise in editing and can demonstrate that their editors are properly credentialled (e.g., Scribendi – I have gone through their credentialling process and can vouch for the fact that it is brutal!).
• Although price is obviously an important consideration, try not to simply go with the cheapest option. Your book is a passion project, and you want to ensure it is in good hands. Look at your editor’s credentials and experience, but also their interest and enthusiasm for your project (as above).

What your editor should ask you:

If you consider your editor your support crew, it becomes obvious that, in order for them to be effective in their role, they need more than just a highly developed grasp of written language (although that is essential!).

Your editor should be asking you questions like:

• What is the purpose of your book?
• How will you know you have achieved your purpose (i.e., what reaction/s are you hoping to evoke in your readers?
• Who is your intended audience (primary and secondary)?
  • What is their assumed knowledge?
  • What is their reading ability?
• Are there any quirks about your writing that you want addressed?
• Are there any quirks about your writing that you want left alone?
• Are there any sensitive issues/topics that you need special attention paid to?
• Is there anything about your book that could be confusing to readers that you want special attention paid to (e.g., do you switch between using someone’s full name and their nickname without meaning to)?

What you should be asking your editor:

• How do they charge (i.e., by the hour/word count/project)?
• If they charge per project – how many revisions are included in that fee?
• Do they have content knowledge of your topic? (This is especially important if you are getting developmental editing but is also helpful for other types of editing.)
• What is their typical turnaround time?
• What do they need from you in order to be able to complete their task as quickly as possible?

When to choose your editor

When it comes to choosing your editor, it can be really helpful to start having conversations with potential editors quite early in your author journey. Here’s why:

• Developmental editing needs to occur before the bulk of your writing has been done, so finding your editor early gives you the option of having a thorough developmental edit undertaken.
• You can agree on a timeframe for your project that is mutually convenient. This is extremely powerful, because it serves as an accountability measure for you as the author, whilst ensuring that, when the time comes, your editor is ready for your manuscript.

It can be so frustrating when you have laboured over your book to get it to editing by a certain date (that makes sense to you), and your editor lets you know they have a backlog of work and won’t get to it for another week (or longer). Of course, your timeframe may need to remain flexible, but it is extremely helpful to have it as a guide.

Although your book is your book, having the right team to accompany you on your author journey will enhance both the process and the outcome.  

If you have any questions about editing, or any aspect of writing your own book, please feel free to send me an email: [email protected]

Here’s to writing fearlessly,

Xx Kate

The post How to make sure you and your editor are on the same page appeared first on Astute Consulting Services.

When you think about international bestselling authors who have made a huge impact in the lives of millions of people, you might think of names like Glennon Doyle, Brené Brown, Marie Forleo, Gabrielle Bernstein, and Elizabeth Gilbert.

You might also think, “I could never do what they have done.”

And, to some extent, perhaps you are correct.

As it currently stands, each of these authors has an international profile, lucrative publishing contract, and the capacity to sell millions of books on reputation alone. (Obviously, they continue to produce works of high quality, so those reputations are well-deserved.)

But it wasn’t always that way.

Each of those authors started from obscurity. They weren’t handed their profiles or their publishing contracts. They had to work for them, and it wasn’t easy. It required consistency, dedication, belief, and perhaps some luck. But it was more than that.

Apart from being skilled writers, these authors share an important characteristic, and it is this characteristic that, I believe, is the greatest driver of their success, impact, and influence.

It’s not money. Each of these authors started from humble beginnings.  

It’s not that they get to hang out with Oprah (although they do, and it certainly hasn’t hurt their career trajectories!).

What these authors have in common is a willingness to share their experiences honestly and authentically. It is their shared capacity for vulnerability that has been their magic dust and enabled them to connect and inspire millions of readers around the world.

The best news is that this is available to all of us.

We each have a story, and we can impact others by sharing it. When we speak our truth and share it honestly, we connect authentically.

There’s no doubt it takes courage to be vulnerable. In our Insta-worthy paradigm of filters and special effects, it can feel strange to let others see our less-than-glamourous reality. But that is where the connection happens.

Readers don’t love Glennon Doyle because she claims to have it all together, all of the time. Quite the opposite. Her catchphrase is, “we can do hard things”, and the frequency with which she repeats it is an indication of how often she needs the reminder.

She also cautions her followers that she is a clinically depressed motivational speaker, so if you expect sunshine and rainbows and a fictional Insta-perfect-not-reality all of the time, you are looking in the wrong place.

However, these vulnerabilities do not deter her audience. Quite the opposite. It is her refreshing capacity for sharing her truth that draws people closer.

When I wrote my book, I agonised over the inclusion of some of my most painful episodes. I questioned whether it would seem as though I was seeking sympathy or airing my dirty laundry.

However, each of those stories contained lessons I had learned and could be of service to others.

To my surprise, it was those stories that my readers commented on. They related to my times of pain, frustration, embarrassment, and grief. They thanked me for sharing my truth and told me how much I helped them by doing so.  

That’s how I know writing a book that makes an impact is not just for famous people and influencers.

Although I have not topped the New York Times Bestseller list, and Oprah hasn’t called me (yet), I am confident that my story has impacted my readers, and yours will too.

So, please don’t deprive the world of your story because you are waiting to be famous to tell it. Those who need to hear it need to hear it, regardless of how “unready” you think you are to share it.

You are the authority in your story, and that is all the credibility you require. Be brave. Be vulnerable. Share your truth and make your impact. Nobody else can tell your story the way you can.

Xx Kate

If you would like to keep in touch, please feel free to subscribe to my newsletter.

To get started on exploring your author journey, please feel free to schedule your free 15-minute chat here: https://astuteconsultingservicesappointment.as.me/discovery

The post Why you don’t have to be famous to write a book that adds value appeared first on Astute Consulting Services.

I recently completed my first book, and it was quite the learning experience. Here are some of my biggest take-aways:

1. If something is on your to-do list for “someday”, do it as soon as you can.

For as long as I can remember, I have intended to write a book. I just didn’t know when that would happen or what it would be about. When I finally decided what the topic was, and that the time was now, I was amazed at how quickly it came together.

However, the most compelling reason I share this lesson is what happened when I was finished writing my book. That is, other ideas started bubbling to the surface. It seemed as though my first book was blocking my creativity, and I needed to get it out of the way.

Since submitting my book for publishing, I have developed an idea for a second book, and am exploring the possibility of writing a book for someone else. These ideas would never have occurred to me if I hadn’t completed my first book.

2. Flow state is not just for yogis.

I have heard about flow state and even had small glimpses of it, but I have mostly found it a nice idea that remained relatively elusive. So, although I believed it was possible to be in flow, I was resigned to this being the purview of those who were more enlightened than me.

To my surprise, the act of committing to regular writing about a topic which felt important enough to put into a book created a sense of alignment, purpose and productivity which can only be described as flow. There were multiple occasions when I genuinely lost track of time, and the words would flow (pardon the pun) with ease.

That is not to say I spent the entire writing process in flow. There were definitely moments when I felt stuck, overwhelmed, frustrated and even anxious. However, these were interspersed with periods of ease and flow which meant that I submitted my complete draft to my editor more than a month before my most optimistic expectations.   

3. Making a public commitment to something will exponentially increase the likelihood of you completing it.

To increase the likelihood of completing my book, I joined a mentoring program which provides logistical, mindset and accountability support throughout the book writing and publication process.

A key component of that mentoring program was a weekend retreat. On the first night of that retreat, each of the participants announced our book’s imminent completion and unveiled our book cover on social media. We even started accepting presales.

This was incredibly motivating. Knowing that my friends, family, and social followers not only:

(a) knew that I was writing this book; but

(b) had actually paid money to receive a copy

provided an incontrovertible level of accountability.

Thankfully, that feeling of accountability and obligation was far more powerful than the fear of failing that my perfectionism threw at me in an attempt to thwart my goal of finishing the book.

There were several moments throughout the writing process that I doubted my ability, my idea, the value of my book. Without the strong sense of obligation I felt to produce something (anything!) to send to those who had purchased my book, I may have allowed myself to become derailed.

Those doubts and fears may not have been enough to cause me to abandon my plans altogether, but I can see how easily I could have become stuck in a cycle of procrastination and overthinking, leading to a loss of motivation. In this way, my incomplete manuscript could easily have become one of the 97% of “would be” books that are never seen to completion.

Thankfully, I pushed through those fears, and got the job done.

Now that I have ticked that item off my bucket list, I am buzzing with the possibilities of what is next. Knowing that I can do something which seemed hard, but was easier than I thought, has provided the impetus for me to keep moving towards things that seem out of reach.

So, if you get the chance to do something that seems scary but alluring, go for it. You may be surprised by what you find on the other side.

If you are keen to learn more about my book, it is called “Why Being Good Can be Bad for You” and it is available here:

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Saying “yes” is simple, and likely to be rewarding. We all share 6 basic human needs (certainty, variety, significance, connection, growth and contribution), and saying “yes” is likely to satisfy most, if not all, of them. Thus, it can become addictive.

By saying “yes”, we obtain a sense of certainty, e.g., we know “it” will be done properly, because we are going to do it ourselves. It can also bring variety – saying “yes” to new things can be exciting. Our desire to feel a sense of significance, connection, growth and contribution is highly satisfied when we agree to do things for others.

Further, our sense of self as a kind, giving, generous and useful person is also likely to be reaffirmed when we say “yes”. With all of this reinforcement for our “yes” habit, there’s no surprise that many of us say “yes” more than we intend to!

However, saying “yes” can also lead to feelings of overwhelm, stress, dissatisfaction and resentment.  I would even dare to say there is an epidemic of people who feel chronically over-committed and desperate to reduce the number of things on their never-ending and ever-growing “to do” list.

If you have found yourself feeling that sense of overwhelm, you may have reached the conclusion that you need to be more strategic. This begs the question – what does “being strategic” actually mean?

Michael Porter, a respected academic who has written extensively about business strategy and competition (among several other topics), suggests that “The essence of strategy is choosing what not to do.”

When I came across this definition, I found myself nodding vigorously. He is absolutely right. The use of a strategic “no” can not only liberate you from doing something you don’t want to do, it also frees you up to say “yes” to something more important.

Deciding what to say “no” to can seem daunting, especially if you are a seasoned “yesser”. One helpful approach is to identify your top 5 values, which then become your points of reference when faced with a request. Having clarity about your priorities will make it simple to evaluate each request on their merits and make your decision based on what is in alignment with your priorities.

Often, we say “yes” out of fear. We are afraid that if we don’t say “yes” we may experience rejection, or judgement, or disappointment, or we might miss out on something. However, when we say “no” for the right reasons, those undesirable outcomes become (a) less likely; and (b) less impactful, because we enjoy the certainty that come from making choices that align with our highest priorities.

In my personal quest to attain the elusive “work life balance” (I’ll be sure to let you know when I find it), I have developed an aspiration to: “Say yes when I mean yes, and no when I mean no.” My “yes” habit is stubborn and difficult to break, which makes this aspiration surprisingly difficult. However, it is extremely powerful when I get it right. And now that I’m getting better at saying “no”, I’m working on doing so without offering to do something else instead!

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The world is noisy and writhing with sensory stimulation, and there is too much information for our brains to process at any given time. For this reason, we have a number of cognitive processing capacities, such as selective attention, which help us to focus on the things which are important.

Without these capacities, we would be overwhelmed with information and unable to process any of it in a meaningful way.

We also have access to a number of mechanisms which support these broader cognitive capacities to navigate our sensorially overloaded environment. For example, heuristics, which are basically mental shortcuts, help us to make decisions quickly. Based on previous experiences and knowledge, heuristics enable us to quickly make sense of a situation and decide in an efficient and (somewhat) effective manner.

However, there is a catch.

Whilst heuristics can make us efficient decision makers, they can also lead to cognitive biases. This means that we make decisions based on things which appear obvious or meaningful to us in that moment, rather than evaluating all of the possibilities we could consider. In essence, the decisions we make in the present are close replicas of decisions we have made previously, even if the circumstances are different.

One of the cognitive biases that appears to be playing out in the world at the moment is that of confirmation bias.

This means that when we believe something to be true, we are extremely proficient at noticing or finding evidence in support of our beliefs. We notice things that align with our thinking and use them to reinforce how right we were in the first place. The clues we look for to confirm our beliefs are already more salient to us, simply because we have been thinking about them.

A simplistic example of this is when you buy a new car or decide what car you would like to buy. Suddenly, everywhere you look, you notice others driving that kind of car. You may ask yourself, “Why are there suddenly so many cars just like my new one?” The most likely answer is that they were always there. You just didn’t notice them, until you decided to buy that type of car, and it became salient to you.

In the same way, when we have beliefs about groups of people or the way things “are” or “should be”, we can easily find confirmation for our perspective.

We surround ourselves with people who think like us. We read books and listen to podcasts by people who talk like us. We may convince ourselves that we are open to an impartial version of the truth because we get our information from the news, but we are drawn to news services that speak our language and confirm our beliefs.

If we are feeling brave, we may even engage in debate in public forums, with people who don’t agree with us. Although I tend to avoid these types of discussions, so my perspective is limited, I am yet to see a thread where anyone convinced anyone else of their position. Rather, it seems that those who disagree become further entrenched in their position, and the gap between the perspectives widens rather than narrows. As far as I can tell that type of dialogue typically isn’t about broadening one’s understanding. It is about imposing one’s version of reality on the other and asserting the need to be right.

It is human to want to feel safe, connected, and, let’s face it, right.

It is natural to want to be with others who allow us to feel those things. However, when we only listen and learn from those who are saying what we think we already know, we are amplifying our confirmation biases and protecting our status quo. That is understandable, especially when our status quo is serving us well. However, it can also be dangerous.

It is dangerous when our status quo contains beliefs about ourselves or others that are negative or harmful. It is dangerous when our status quo enables us to pretend that everything is ok, when clearly it is not. It is extremely dangerous when our status quo creates the safety of an “us vs them” dichotomy, which in turn provides the space to blame others for the way the world mistreats them.

As we grapple with recent events which have made it impossible to pretend that everything is ok, I believe it is important to ask questions, starting with ourselves.

We need to ask ourselves not only what we believe, but also why we believe it. If we think we know something, especially about another person’s experiences, we need to ask ourselves, “How do I know?”. Unless the answer is because we have personally lived that experience, it’s imperative that we acknowledge the limitation to our understanding.

In the space that we create between thinking that we know, and recognising that we don’t know, we provide an opportunity to learn and grow.

If we approach our world with curiosity and compassion, rather than the conviction that we know, there is space for us to learn from each other. When the problems are complicated and the answers seem beyond our reach, there is power in questions. If only to get the conversation started, ask yourself what you know and how you know, and be open to the possibility that actually you don’t. As Alfred Korzybski said, “the map is not the territory”. Perhaps we all need to check our maps and be open to some recalibration.

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As lockdown eases and the prospect of returning to normality becomes an imminent reality, you may be experiencing some mixed feelings. I know I am.

Whilst we cannot forget that there have been many negative impacts of lockdown, especially in relation to mental health, social connection, and of course, the economy, it is also true that for some there have been some unexpected benefits. Hence, the mixed feelings.

On the one hand, there is excitement.

After several weeks of homeschool, my kids are fed up with looking at a computer screen, and they cannot wait until they can connect with their teachers and their friends again. They have missed their friends, their sport, and their routines.

Similarly, although I have been fortunate enough to be able to work (somewhat) effectively from home, there is a definite advantage to being in the same room as someone when you are working together. So, despite being a confirmed introvert, I am excited about being around people again.

Being able to visit with friends and family will be great, and there is no doubt that we will be hosting lots of catchups in the coming months. Connection with our friends and family is vital, and we have definitely missed it these past few months, in spite of our regular catchups on Facetime and over the phone.

However, there is also a sense of hesitation about mindlessly resuming our lives in the same manner as before.

Lockdown has provided a unique opportunity for reflection. For some, this has resulted in a deep appreciation for the way things were, and a yearning to return to “normal”. However, for others, there has been a realisation that the way things were was not serving them well, and there are lessons to be learned from lockdown. These include:

Creating positive new habits

For example, the lack of “places to be” by “x o’clock” has provided extra time and energy to create new and fulfilling habits. For me, this has meant walking our dogs almost every day; something I “meant to do” for years, but never found the time.

Despite loving our four-leggeds dearly, the busyness of our schedule meant the best they got in the past was an irregular, guilt-laden, quick trip around the block. Their almost apoplectic excitement each time the leads came out of the drawer was a fair indicator of the rarity of the event. To say they have enjoyed lockdown is probably an understatement!

For others I have spoken with, it has been the establishment of a previously desired, but never implemented, exercise routine; spending time in the garden; reading; or preparing the evening meal as a family, which has become a possibility for the first time ever.

Increased appreciation for what we have

There have been opportunities to appreciate the good things in our lives, either because we felt the sting of having them unavailable, or because they have sustained us at a time when other things have been removed.

Highlighting what we don’t want to go back to

It is also possible that lockdown has amplified some aspects of our lives that we want to change. The change of pace may have illuminated just how exhausting our previous schedule was; or the benefits of not having to deal with a challenging work colleague have been so notable, the thought of going back to the office creates a sense of unease. You may have recognised that you were so busy being all things to all people that you were on the verge of burning out, and lockdown has provided a reprieve you didn’t know you needed.

Where to from here?

Emerging from lockdown can mean a return to normal.

But it doesn’t have to.

If you don’t want to return to the hustle and grind of your old normal, now is the perfect time to set new goals, create new habits, and cultivate a new mindset.

If you are interested in learning more about how to do this, I’ve created a special coaching package specifically to support you to design your new normal with intention. It’s called, “Better than Before”, and it’s coming soon. To learn more about “Better than Before”, simply click on the link below.

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